The ways in which counselling helps the client is by listening and prompting.
The listening helps you to get a problem out in the open with someone who can help you to work on it objectively.
The prompting, in the form of gentle questions or reflections, can help you to focus on important areas of your life which can allow you to see the problems in new ways.
The best answer is . . . it all depends.
The first appointment is an assessment session in which we both decide whether or not to work together. I have an opportunity to discover what you are hoping for from therapy and you have a chance to discover whether you think you will find what you are looking for here.
Some therapy can be very brief. One session may be all that is needed, depending on the nature of the problem being presented. For example, phobias can often be cured with one session. Or sometimes, you just need to get someone else's professional opinion of what you need to do in a given situation.
Most problems take longer, but how long will depend on the nature of the problem, the goals that you want to achieve, other resources available to help with the problem and your own personal commitment and skills in dealing with the challenges that you face.
Ultimately, you get to decide how long you want to continue in therapy. Unlike some other approaches, my attitude is that, as the therapist, I work for you, not the other way round. I recommend that in any therapeutic work you talk with your therapist in advance in order to get an idea of how long the work might take.
Betrayal in a relationship causes a lot of pain, hurt and confusion. It certainly is emotionally upsetting and draining. Some people or couples never recover from that and it ultimately leads to the breakdown of their relationship. Others hang in there and work it through over a long period of time with the help of a counsellor.
Rebuilding the trust in a relationship after an affair can be a daunting prospect and it would need a commitment to the relationship from both you and your partner.
You and your partner may want to consider counselling to discuss your feelings and to gain an understanding of yourselves and your situation and your needs within your relationship which will strengthen your capacity to make choices and your ability to achieve goals.
Counselling can help couples to:
There is widespread agreement among researchers that counselling is effective in 60-70% of cases.
Generally, No . . . notes are not maintained, apart from contact details; name, address and phone number.
You may request the counsellor to keep notes on your sessions if you wish and this may be helpful should there be a future requirement to provide legal information to the courts.
You can phone any time if you are in crisis and the situation can not wait until your next scheduled appointment. Where ever possible time will be made to accommodate you however this can not always be guaranteed. There is a list of alternate options to consider when you are in crisis and are unable to contact me.
Yes, without-a-doubt many relationships that frequently appear to be totally lost are brought-back-to-life through counselling. To a large extent this is dependent on the effort that both you and your partner put in to achieving this.
The counselling relationship is different from other relationships and needs to follow certain ethical principles in order to maintain its effectiveness. Although within the counselling session there may be a high level of friendliness and closeness, having a friendship with clients outside the sessions may interfere with the counselling process. Therefore counsellors do not generally become their clients' friends.
Clients should not feel coerced by their counsellor into taking a particular action. Counsellors are non-judgmental and are prepared for you to discuss any issue, including concerns you may have about the counselling relationship. Counsellors are not permitted to have a romantic or sexual relationship with their clients.
Counsellors are qualified to provide professional court reports. There MAY be a charge for this service.
This would have to be one of the most common questions asked of us. This situation often occurs because couples are so worn out by the problems they face that they see little hope of anyone being able to help them.
If your partner refuses to attend counselling, it is important that you at least start easing your own pain and stress. One positive step is for you to attend counselling. By doing this, you will be demonstrating to your partner that the relationship is important and that you are taking the issues seriously.
You will still gain strategies and skills towards resolving the issues and most importantly you will have support. As changes occur within the relationship, your partner may begin to see the positives within the relationship and then decide to join you in couples counselling.
Many men will not do the work they need to do on themselves for themselves. I suggest asking him a few questions with the purpose of getting him thinking. If he has children asking him questions about himself as a father. This is very useful as men generally want to be a great father to their children.
Questions could include "What kind of father did you have? What kind of father do you want to be? What is the legacy that you want to pass on to your children? What sort of role model do you want to be to your children? What sort of husband was your father? Do you want to be the same type of partner/husband as him or different?
I provide a range of times such as Saturdays and Weekday evenings.
This is not an uncommon occurrence for one person to gain insight and understanding of themselves through their experience of participating in couples counselling.
Through counselling, you will gain an understanding of how some occurrences and situations in your life history and experiences have had a negative influence on you and your relationships. You will want to address these issues so that you can take control over your life instead of the issues running your life.
Through counselling, you will gain an understanding of how some occurrences and situations in your life history and experiences have had a negative influence on you and your relationships. You will want to address these issues so that you can take control over your life instead of the issues running your life.
In most people, feelings of sadness, unhappiness, and disappointment are as common as fun, enjoyment, satisfaction and happiness. All of us experience a range and variety of emotions and feelings every day.
If feelings of anxiety and unhappiness show up occasionally most of us cope. But there is a marked difference between coping and the crippling effects of long term, often undiagnosed, depression. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy can significantly help with depression.
A referral is not necessary.
Sometimes a referral for counselling may be given by your medical practitioner but this is usually just to pass on their understanding of the problem.